Pink Poogle Toy Forum

Help I need a column name!

The Buffer Zone
Sunday night and watching Carrie Bradshaw explain the intricacies of New York relationships, I begin to consider the relationships that define how bodybuilders interact with one another in contrast with what is normally seen between the male population in an everyday context. Most interesting to me is the breakdown of rules between male interaction, or dare I say, male bonding? Does bodybuilding allow us males to forgo the social fears of being perceived something other than straight among our peers and allow us an emotional freedom to interact with our peers without the constraints of commonly accepted social proprietary amongst males?

On the Iron Man wallpapers page are photos of David Henry, Toney Freeman and Mark Dugdale parading their gym-toned bodies for the world to see. Ironically, while their proud structures communicate a sub-liminal alpha-male status, their Zeus-like figures are framed by a 2 inch nylon-stretch bikini that could fit my 5 year-old nephew quite comfortably and make any botox patient jealous. This interesting dichotomy between alpha-maleness and the bikini that are usually only reserved for the die-hard partiers at the Mardi Gras and the fashion-challenged at local beaches provide a paradox that while is almost in-your-face in more ways than one, is commonly accepted. Does bodybuilding allow us to emasculate ourselves, served under the guise of a sport so masculine that it makes American football players look like they belong in the junior league?

The evidence is everywhere. At the 2007 Iron Man competition, vegetable-oiled men parade themselves in tight bikini-bottoms to an adoring crowd. In the photo gallery at bodybuilding.com, men observe and provide detailed critiques of other men’s bodies and in most cases, we post half-naked photos of ourselves on the Internet in the hopes that someone will tell us that we look a little bigger.

We all know that competitive beach volleyball players like the occasional arse slap every now and then. OK, maybe after every point they win, but served under the sport context, this is palatable by the general populace. From a bodybuilding context, why are straight bodybuilders allowed to look at quasi naked pictures of men, but still be considered straight? Is this a pandemonium or worse, a new threat to 21st century male heterosexuality? Or are the two extremes converging into a male hybrid ready to be embraced and universally adored by the world?

To the uninitiated, scratching under the surface of the bodybuilding community can be a scary experience. After the deluge of baritone voices and the clang of metal on metal, testosterone-induced grunts and stench of sweat, there is a common acceptance or sympathy that everyone is in the same boat. Perhaps it is this shared experience that has freed the male bodybuilder and allowed him to communicate openly with his peers. From this extremity, it is commonly accepted that perhaps, we are allowed to be a little emotional and emasculated, if it means at the end, we all become buff fitness-models who can draw the women like foreign bees to the air-vent in my room who stubbornly refuse to leave despite my best efforts.

Maybe without knowing, we are all aware of this unique phenomenon and while being unable to profess to it, we balance it by portraying a tough love mentality to each other as another way of saying, “Look buddy, I think you can really do it if you try.” Common around the community are phrases like “Get off your arse … fatty,” and “Shut up and squat,” which is really another way of saying, “Go! Go! Go! You can do it!” Flippant responses such as “O’RLY” and “PITTB” are really code for “I hear you!” while responses to suicide threads such as, “Go ahead and die pussy,” are really another way of telling another person that the only way they can become a better person in the long term is if they help themselves first. It’s a wooden stick, but strangely it works. This is what I refer to as the buffer zone. A zone that exists somewhere in the twilight zone, that translates our recognition of emotional responsibility into primitive grunts often accompanied by the eye-rolling of the female population and exclamations of “Men!”

With the 2007 Iron Man about to start, it will be interesting to see how the competitors present themselves this year. Will the camaraderie of shared experience be more obvious that it was in previous years and will the future of bodybuilding incorporate highly choreographed routines that draw influences from callisthenics and jazz?

With the great selection of wallpapers now available to spruce up a desktop, there is no excuse for the die-hard bodybuilder to be ashamed of being a part of a movement filled with people who sympathize and work together to achieve a physique normally reserved for superheroes in comic books. Now if only my friends didn’t think I was gay for sporting a bodybuilding wallpaper.

lol good one. Ok here's the second column I wrote today. It's considers why men are able to look at other pictures of men but still be considered straight.

Truth behind the muscle eh? Kinda like an expose lol.

Oh don't sweat Jacob, if you read the column, it's actually very positive - the evolution of man!

Bodybuilding wallpapers can be obtained here: http://www.bodybuilding.com/fun/2007iro ... papers.htm